“Forget love, I’d rather fall in chocolate!”
Yes, that’s a real quote that I read somewhere several years ago, and I wrote it in my inspirational quote journal (yes, I really have one) and tucked it away in my heart. The sentiment is nice. It’s a cute quote to pull out when one of your friends need a little encouragement in their singleness. Or when someone asks you why you’re single.
But chocolate doesn’t cure everything. (Sorry to ruin your pleasant illusions.) Some days we just feel plain lousy. And some days, no matter what anybody says, we just can’t handle watching others be happy in their romantic relationships when we have none. There are a million articles out there reminding us that true love waits and that Jesus is all we need and that each person is beautiful. And while those things are absolutely true, the nice sentiments and pithy quotes just don’t cut it. The empty longing remains. The impatience returns. The lies invade.
I think what it ultimately comes down to is contentment. I know I have been writing a lot about this lately, but after all it is one of my goals for 2014. Feeling discontent and worthless will only leave you feeling discontent and worthless.
I was going to write this post on the perks of being single, but most of us have already heard that pitch before. I’m going to focus on contentment instead. There’s a current song on the radio called “Let Her Go” by Passenger. In recent weeks, it has reached the top alternative and pop charts. But for every lover of the song, there’s a hater. Despite what you may think of the musicality of the song or the sound of the voice, the words hold a lot of truth. (If you feel like you must hear the song, follow the link.) The chorus reads, “Well you only need the light when it’s burning low / Only miss the sun when it starts to snow / Only know you love her when you let her go.” Plain and simple, we don’t appreciate what we have.
Single? Celebrate! Just as I last wrote about how being a teenager is a unique opportunity, so is being single. You have less obligations and more time. Don’t waste these years pining for Prince Charming. He may or may not ever enter your fairytale. But instead of focusing on what you don’t have, focus on what you do have. You’ll miss out on a lot of amazing experiences if you spend all your Friday nights and Valentine’s Days watching chick flicks and eating chocolate. As a single lady, I plan to spend this time loving my family, working towards a career, building great friendships, and serving God. And I may enjoy some dark chocolate and peppermint tea along the way.
Whether God has a Prince Charming (or a Cinderella if you’re a guy) in store for you ultimately does not matter. What you do with what He gives you does matter.
We’ve all heard John 3:16 before, but this time focus on the words: “For God loved the world so much that He gave His one and only Son, so whoever believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life.”
He loves you. Yes, YOU. Simple to understand, but not so simple to grasp. Our human nature slips in. We want to be loved by others. We want to be beautiful, recognized, and happy. And on some days, we want to wallow in self-pity and be grumpy. But life isn’t forever. Heaven awaits. So instead of wafting through life wishing for something more, enjoy each moment for what it is–divine.
For another great article on being content in your singleness, check out this post!
– – Phebe